RAPE IS RAPE… Warning, this may not be easy for some of you to read…

This is a week over due and it’s simply because I debated if writing what I felt would help the cause or was it just from my anger… Lately I have been inundated with male politicians telling me what defines rape, what I am allowed and not allowed to do with my body and I am tired of keeping quiet.

RAPE IS RAPE, there is no getting around it, there is no such thing as “Legitimate Rape” and rape is NOT just another form of conception. Dictionary.com defines rape as ‘the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse.” And Webster’s New World Dictionary defines rape as “The crime of having sexual intercourse with a woman forcibly and without her consent”.

I have very few memories of my childhood, but I remember every single second of my rape. I was 12 years old when it happened, I was locked in a pitch dark basement for what seemed like hours and I have no idea if it was one man or several men, but it went on and on and on. I was terrified, confused and told that my family would be killed if I ever said anything, so I went back to school and for years I pretended nothing happened to me. The scars, while not physical, remain with me today. I began to put on weight almost immediately, with the exception of my high school sweetheart, I haven’t had one healthy relationship with any man, during most of my 20s I was a hardcore drug addict and I slept with anyone who showed me the slightest bit of interest and to this day I am so f*cking scare of the dark I panic to the point of temporary insanity if I don’t have some form of light around me. Yep, I’m going to be 41 years old next week and I still have a night light…

If, from my rape, I was left pregnant, 12 years old and pregnant (Thank God I wasn’t) according to the Republicans of the United States, I am meant to have the child… It’s simply “another method of conception”, and “Just the same as pregnancy out of wedlock”. I am left to give birth, raise a child that was conceived out of violence, rage, sickness? How dare they even suggest that be the only way. It’s my body, my choice.

It’s only the last 3 years I have really allowed myself to talk about what happened to me, to confront those demons, and try to find some peace with the whole damned thing… If I’m ever to truly find happiness in my life I need to… (And the only reason I am speaking so bluntly today is I am sickened by what has been happening in the world and nothing is being done…)

So 30 years later I am still fighting a war I didn’t ask for, and didn’t deserve and then to be told that there is a thing such as “Legitimate Rape” offends me to my deepest core. Women and children are being raped every second of every day in every country and so little is done to protect them. So few resources are available that the majority of cases are unreported, and abusers, RAPISTS, go on to rape again. Their victims are left with a silent shame that will follow them to the end of their days.

I implore you, male and female, regardless of your religion, political party, or any other belief system, understand that rape is rape, no means no, and to stand up for the victims, stop the maniacal politicians from taking away a woman’s basic rights… Stop them from speaking and acting (ignorantly) on issues they can’t even begin to understand…  Rape is rape, I’ll say it again and again, until my dying breath, if that is what it will take for the world to wake up… RAPE IS RAPE…



3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Vivek - The evolved brother
    Aug 30, 2012 @ 00:44:58

    Wow Lalita,
    This is so powerful.
    With people like you fighting for a better world evil will be vanquished!
    Your courage and your love, your determination and your kindness, these things can bring real transformation.
    Overcoming adversity, dealing with your demons, fighting the war (that you didn’t ask for) and never giving up… You are a true warrior.

    I love you and I am proud to be your brother.


  2. oalaego
    Aug 30, 2012 @ 02:20:18

    Very powerful sharing! It is not easy to read that such a horrible event happened to a young girl, but it is truly inspiring how you are overcoming it in your life and fighting for all women. The ramblings of all the US male politicians talking about what women should and shouldn’t have the right to do with their bodies or what access they should have to contraception has been nauseating. Thank you for sharing your experience, strength and determination.


  3. Marlyn Chadderton
    Aug 30, 2012 @ 21:52:21

    Oh my dear, I am so sorry to read of the horror you endured at 11 years old. You are absolutely correct. Rape is Rape and No means No. Also the right to have an abortion if a Rape causes conception – is a woman or girl’s right – no one else should have any part of the discussion. I am a believer and will fight right along side you! Call me if you need me!
    Marlyn Chadderton, old friend, and neighbour!


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